Thursday, January 17, 2008
Dreams
Last week I had a dream about my ex wife again. Its been a long time to have one of these dreams. I just wonder if I will have these dreams the rest of my life, because this one hurt.
I was haning out with friends, in some two story house. And I came down stairs to see her. She was laying in bed watching tv. And commented about something someone said. So I told her I loved her, and then I lay down beside her. It was weird, because of the way all this seemed normal.
And I started telling her that I know we have been busy with work. And that we had drifted apart over the last few months, but I loved her and I wanted to work out our problems. And she started crying, and shaking her head. Like she understood.
I woke up, and did not think about it much. I went through my day. Looking for jobs, playing games, checking the iternet. And day grew to night and about half an hour before bed, I just started to cry. I just could not stop crying. I just felt the lonliest I have ever felt. Finally I fell asleep, and during the night I had another dream about her.
This one was not too specific. I can not remeber anything about it. But I just know she was there with me. And when I woke up the dream just vanished from my thughts.
Now 2 days in a row was odd. But by the third morning, I was worried about her. I had a dream where she lay in a dark bedroom, on a white bed. She was naked. And I walked over to her and asked if she was okay. When she rolled over, she was drenched with sweat. And I touched her forhead, and she was burning with a fever. I covered her up and lay down beside her. It was just weird.
I was glad when I seen she visited the blog later that day becuase I really was worried about her. I have no idea what any of those dreams meant. Maybe they are just reminders of how empty my life is. Maybe they are the universe teling me that if I done something I coul have changed my faith. or maybe it was just ating Chinese food three days in a row.
It looks like my co-host wont be able to make the show on Sunday. So there is a possibility that I may be doing it solo. I am sure one of the other guys will journey across the bridge to give me a hand.
It will be the 17th show. We have not missed a week yet. At least I know I can do something that works. I was not going to do the show, but a few of the audience seemed to be annoyed that was not going to do it, so I promise them a short show if someone does not show up. Hell maybe my mom will co-host it with me.
I woke up to take her to work Monday morning. And could not find my glasses anywhere. That it is a weird feeling. I cant see anything with out them which made finding them even more difficult.
Time was running out so I thought I was going to have to drive without them. Its a short drive to her work. But luckily my old glasses where in a drawer. Andit felt odd wearing those things they weighed a ton.
When I got home I found them in the bed. Not sure how they got there becuase I never sleep in my glasses. I wondered if I went sleepwalking somewhere.
Mom and I are thinking about getting pug after we get tax money. I really want one. I miss little Tiki. I just hope I can find a job soon. I dont want to work at Mcdonalds or something. I think of that and it really makes wanting to live that much harder.
American Idol started this week. And I am not watching it. I started watching it Last year because it gave me something to talk to Mel about. Its hard to believe that next week would have been a year for us talkng. Never have heard from her. Oh well. Not that I am suprised.
I entered to be part of the review crew for Allgames.com. Our editor would be a Member of the LA Daily News. But I did not make it, I think my review was too dry. SO I am not sure how close in the running I was. But i can always submit columns to them, and maybe earn me a spot that way.
However this week I was trusted by one of the host enough to keep track of what went on in the show. So that was interesting. I m not sure why Mayor Young chose me, but I felt good that they thought me trustworthy enough.
Ok well I guess I am going to get off here. This is the longest post I have had i awhile. Have a good night.
Robert
I was haning out with friends, in some two story house. And I came down stairs to see her. She was laying in bed watching tv. And commented about something someone said. So I told her I loved her, and then I lay down beside her. It was weird, because of the way all this seemed normal.
And I started telling her that I know we have been busy with work. And that we had drifted apart over the last few months, but I loved her and I wanted to work out our problems. And she started crying, and shaking her head. Like she understood.
I woke up, and did not think about it much. I went through my day. Looking for jobs, playing games, checking the iternet. And day grew to night and about half an hour before bed, I just started to cry. I just could not stop crying. I just felt the lonliest I have ever felt. Finally I fell asleep, and during the night I had another dream about her.
This one was not too specific. I can not remeber anything about it. But I just know she was there with me. And when I woke up the dream just vanished from my thughts.
Now 2 days in a row was odd. But by the third morning, I was worried about her. I had a dream where she lay in a dark bedroom, on a white bed. She was naked. And I walked over to her and asked if she was okay. When she rolled over, she was drenched with sweat. And I touched her forhead, and she was burning with a fever. I covered her up and lay down beside her. It was just weird.
I was glad when I seen she visited the blog later that day becuase I really was worried about her. I have no idea what any of those dreams meant. Maybe they are just reminders of how empty my life is. Maybe they are the universe teling me that if I done something I coul have changed my faith. or maybe it was just ating Chinese food three days in a row.
It looks like my co-host wont be able to make the show on Sunday. So there is a possibility that I may be doing it solo. I am sure one of the other guys will journey across the bridge to give me a hand.
It will be the 17th show. We have not missed a week yet. At least I know I can do something that works. I was not going to do the show, but a few of the audience seemed to be annoyed that was not going to do it, so I promise them a short show if someone does not show up. Hell maybe my mom will co-host it with me.
I woke up to take her to work Monday morning. And could not find my glasses anywhere. That it is a weird feeling. I cant see anything with out them which made finding them even more difficult.
Time was running out so I thought I was going to have to drive without them. Its a short drive to her work. But luckily my old glasses where in a drawer. Andit felt odd wearing those things they weighed a ton.
When I got home I found them in the bed. Not sure how they got there becuase I never sleep in my glasses. I wondered if I went sleepwalking somewhere.
Mom and I are thinking about getting pug after we get tax money. I really want one. I miss little Tiki. I just hope I can find a job soon. I dont want to work at Mcdonalds or something. I think of that and it really makes wanting to live that much harder.
American Idol started this week. And I am not watching it. I started watching it Last year because it gave me something to talk to Mel about. Its hard to believe that next week would have been a year for us talkng. Never have heard from her. Oh well. Not that I am suprised.
I entered to be part of the review crew for Allgames.com. Our editor would be a Member of the LA Daily News. But I did not make it, I think my review was too dry. SO I am not sure how close in the running I was. But i can always submit columns to them, and maybe earn me a spot that way.
However this week I was trusted by one of the host enough to keep track of what went on in the show. So that was interesting. I m not sure why Mayor Young chose me, but I felt good that they thought me trustworthy enough.
Ok well I guess I am going to get off here. This is the longest post I have had i awhile. Have a good night.
Robert
posted by Hendersonman at 10:28 PM, | 
1 Comments:
« back home | Post a Comment
I certainly hope it was the Chinese food...those were some weird dreams. She is out of your life and has no business showing up in your dreams. Time to exorcise her. lol